TGL Volume 4, Chapter 15 (3)

With the help of a volunteer, I figure out how to make this cooking pot mine! Mm, at first, none of them wanted to tell me, but once I was about to Soul Scour one of them, they blabbed, and the method worked! It was really, really simple. All I had to do was shoot my consciousness into the cooking pot like I do when I Soul Scour people! Then, I burn away the worm inside the pot. Mm, the man dressed in furs didn’t really like that for some reason; he was probably sad about losing his rare tool.

Anyways, I’m fulfilling my end of the bargain now. I don’t know why this person wants Baldie so badly, but since he wants her, I’m going to give her to him. Ah? Don’t I feel bad for using Baldie in a trade? Why should I? Baldie can’t cook for me, but this cooking pot can! Mm? “Alright, from here, we turn…. Ilya? Which way do we turn?”

“Hang on, I’m giving instructions to my other group.”

Eh? There’s another group? “What’s this other group?”

“There’s a lot of invaders; you can’t possibly deal with them all on your own,” Ilya said. Mm? Did she think I wasn’t capable? “As such, I gathered a majority of the war force and had them enter this area. They’re my reliable group.”

Reliable group? I’m totally reliable! “Rely on me! I’m the strongest person in the Immortal Continent, damnit! You know that.”

“Yeah, sure,” Ilya said. I could hear the doubt in her voice! It was so loud! “I was relying on you to defeat the person right next to you, but you made friends with him instead. Sophia’s watching you, you know? Even she thought you were a bit cowardly.”

“Um? I didn—”

Sophia’s watching me too? She learned how to read minds from Ilya!? What!? “Sophia! I’m not a coward; I’m the most amazing mommy in the world! Look at this! Flaming Hammer!”

“What the hell!?”

Ooh, this man dressed in furs is pretty strong, just as I expected. My tail was a little springy around him, and I didn’t want to fight him before in case I damaged the cooking pot, but I don’t have to worry about that now! He’s using his bow to block my hammer, but I bet he would’ve used his cooking pot to do that if I hit him earlier. “Flaming Hammer!”

“What are you doing?” The furry man wasn’t budging! His arms were on fire, but it was like he didn’t care about them at all! His bow was on fire too, but it wasn’t breaking. How come such a tiny bow can hold my hammer back? Is it an immortal-ranked weapon like his, err, my cooking pot? “What happened to our deal? Out of respect, I gave you my cooking pot, but you chose not to withhold your end of the bargain. I’ll give you one final chance to backdown; I suggest you take it.”

Ah? Right, the bargain. I almost forgot. “Don’t worry! After I beat you up, I’ll take you to Baldie. Beating you up has nothing to do with our deal, mhm. That way, we’ll both be happy.”

“How are we both going to be happy!?” the furry man asked. He was practically shouting. “Does this mean you insist on meaningless—”

“Flaming Hammer!” This man talks too much. I have to show Sophia my amazing side. Ilya should’ve told me Sophia was watching me earlier! Once I’m done with this furry man, I’ll deal with Ilya next. “I’ll beat you up, which’ll make me happy, and you’ll see Baldie when I’m done beating you, which’ll make you happy. See? Now stand still and stop resisting.”

The furry man disappeared! What the heck? I thought teleporting was forbidden. Ah? He’s standing in the sky super far away! I’m going to find a rock to hit him with. Hmm!? My tail!? Why are you so stiff!?

“Let me teach you the terror of facing a true immortal! One Man, One Arrow, Shooting Down the Sun!”

Holy crap! A beam of light is coming straight towards me! It’s even brighter than the light coming out of the door! I can’t teleport, and I can’t outrun it, then I can only block it with my hammer! Luckily, my hammer is super-duper large, and it was already in front of me because I was swinging. Mm? I’m blocking it, but how is light still so bright!? Is my hammer … breaking? There’s cracks appearing on my hammer, and the light is streaming through! My, my hammer! It’s gone, but the light’s still here! It hurts! It feels like my skin is melting! Is he roasting me alive!? Is this how it feels like to be cooked!? I’m sorry, food! I didn’t know! …But even if I did, I’d still cook you. Ahem, moving on. Agh! It burns!

Everything’s dark. Did I die? I can’t hear anything, and I can’t see anything. Mm, this happens a lot. Am I in my sea of consciousness right now? Maybe I’m in a jade slip. Weird…. Am I a ghost now!? I can’t feel my body at all! I can still think though, so I should be alive? …What if this is death? What if I’m stuck like this forever!? No! I refuse! I don’t like this! If I’m a ghost, I should be able to see the things I’m haunting at the very least! Ah? Wait a second, I can’t see anything, but I can still … see … things? Could this be? My divine sense? Or maybe this is how ghosts see things. Hmm….

Ah! That’s the furry man! He’s approaching a bloody lump on the ground! Hang on…. That bloody lump, it looks like it has a tail. There’s also some frayed socks on it, and a mostly melted sword. Is that … me!? I’ll try to move my arm. Ah! The lump moved. Holy crap! That is me! I think I can’t see anything because that light melted my eyeballs! I can’t see anything because it probably melted my earballs too! Ah, wait a second, ears don’t have balls. Alright, let’s see. Even though I’m like this, I can still move perfectly fine, and I can see perfectly fine too. Just you wait, furry man! Come a little closer, and I’ll hit you so hard you’ll be in even worse shape than me! Mm, I think my hammer dissolved though. Did that light melt my interspacial rings and stuff too!? The only thing I have is Durandal, but I think he’ll break if I swing him. Is he okay…? For now, I’ll use this cooking pot on the ground next to me! The furry man’s in range! Grr!

“What the f***!? How are you still alive!?”

“Braaaaagh Cawgh Paaaaaw Sshhhhh!” Ah. My mouth melted too. I can’t even speak properly, but I still hit him head on with a Breaking Cooking Pot Strike! That’ll teach him to almost kill me! While he’s stunned, I’ll keep bashing him! “Braaaaagh Cawgh Paaaaw Stuuuuw!”

Previous Chapter Next Chapter