Whew! Those invaders finally stopped coming through the door. I don’t even know how much time has passed! Did I miss cooking dinner for Sophia? It’s hard to tell since this bright light is always there. Hmm, it doesn’t seem like the sun is out, but I don’t see the moon either. I guess it’s nighttime then! Mm, I hope Sophia wasn’t waiting too long. Well, she has all kinds of snacks to eat if she ever gets hungry. Speaking of hunger, I’m a bit hungry! I’ll stick around for a bit to make sure no more invaders are coming through. One…. Two…. Three…. Okay! I waited long enough; it’s time to teleport home. Ah? What happens if more people come through after I’m gone? Someone else will take care of it, duh!
Anyways, I’m home! “Hello? Softie! There you are. Where’s Sophia?”
“Oh, Lucia, welcome home.” Softie nodded at me. She was sitting down on her mat with her legs crossed, probably cultivating or something. “Sophia’s outside with Ri. They were asking about you. It seems like they found something and wanted to show it to the both of us.”
Mm? This won’t be the first time Sophia wanted to show us something. At least this time Sophia knows to wait for me to get back! Ah? Did she ever show something to Softie before me and did I react poorly when she did? Nope! Not at all. Why would anyone think that? Ahem, moving on, to the courtyard! “What are we waiting for? Let’s go!”
“Mommy, look!” Sophia opened her bag and took out a … bloody head!?
Why does she have a bloody head!? More importantly, where did the body go!? “Hey, what did I say about eating people?”
Sophia blinked. “Um? We don’t eat people.”
“Right.” I pointed at the head. “Then how do you explain that?” She ate the body, didn’t she? Who cooked it for her? Was it Claw!? I bet it was Claw! He’s always feeding weird things to Sophia! Last time, he fed her a cute rabbit, and I had to teach him a teensy tiny lesson for making her cry.
“Oh.” Sophia stared at the spot where the head’s body should’ve been. “We left it in the bathroom because it was too heavy, and Auntie Ilya said we only needed the head.”
“What the heck is Sister Ilya teaching you!?” Softie shouted, but then she cleared her throat and took in a deep breath. “I mean, excuse me? Sister Ilya told you to do this?”
“Are you okay, Mommy?” Sophia asked Softie. Hmm, it’s a bit odd how their names are so similar. Weird. “Did I do something wrong?”
“No!” Sophia can never do anything wrong! If Sophia does something wrong, then that means someone I made did something wrong, and that’s impossible because I’m always right. “You didn’t do anything wrong at all. So, tell us, what’s this head all about? Did you kill someone? Did you find it on the ground? Did Ilya have you dissect someone for a class?” I think Ilya would make the children dissect someone; it just seems like something she’d do.
“Well, I went to the bathroom, and this man was sleeping inside. He—”
“A grown man in the women’s bathroom? He deserves to be beheaded! You did good.” Ah? Did Softie just hit my arm?
“Let her finish.”
Sophia looked at Softie. Then, she looked at me. “Um, the man was missing an arm and a leg, and he was bleeding a lot. He wasn’t wearing the sect robes, and he didn’t have a nametag. Ri said he must’ve been an invader!” Sophia looked behind herself at Ri, who seemed to be doing her best to avoid looking at me. Why was she doing that? Hmm…. Eh, she must be shy! “Mommy.”
“I was making sure you were listening,” Sophia said. “Auntie Ilya made an announcement. Everyone who brings back an invader’s head gets ten thousand contribution points. Ri took an arrow from me, and she went to stab the man to kill him and cut off his head, but the man woke up and headbutted Ri before she could stab him! Boom! His head broke, and that’s why there’s this crack over here.” Sophia pointed at the head’s forehead. There really was an indent there. “Um, then we ripped off his head and put it in our bag.”
Softie coughed. “Wait. You what?”
Was she not listening? “They ripped off his head and put it in a bag. Sheesh, and you say I’m the one who doesn’t listen while others are talking.”
“No, I mean, how did you rip off his head?” Softie asked. “You … didn’t use your teeth, did you?”
“No,” Sophia said and shook her head. “I was going to, but Ri said that was disgusting and stopped me. We used the arrow and poked his neck a few times until the neck meat was separated. Then—”
Softie coughed again, interrupting Sophia. “Call it flesh, please. When it’s attached to a person, it’s flesh, not meat.”
Sophia’s eyebrows furrowed. “Why?”
Don’t look at me! I’m not sure why either. I’ll look at Softie. “Yeah, why?”
“Meat is something you eat,” Softie said, making small gestures with her hands. “It’s just not socially acceptable to call people’s flesh meat. It’s a weird rule, okay?”
Sophia’s eyes brightened. “You mean like how Mrs. Feathers’ legs are called legs and not drumsticks?”
“Yes, exactly.” Softie nodded. “Okay, you can continue with how you … removed the head from the body.”
“Um, after we poked his neck a few times, there was just the bone left. We wiggled and tugged on the head until it broke and came off.” Sophia beamed. “We did a good job, right? Ri can have all the contribution points! She’s the one who killed him.”
Ah! That’s what was weird! “How did he die by headbutting Ri’s leg?”
Softie frowned. “It was probably the protective amulet Ilya gave her for her birthday.”Previous Chapter Next Chapter